I can't sleep.

I don't know whether it's down to the fact that I had a cheeky nap from 3pm until 6pm that I can't sleep, or if it's because my over active brain keeps thinking of bad things constantly. I'm going to guess that it's a combination of the two. 

Anyway, I thought I'd write a post here to empty the space in my restless mind. The first thing that's bothering me is the fact that today, I noticed a red stretch mark. I know that sounds pretty strange but I had this conversation with my mum the other week and basically when you develop a red stretch mark, it means you're rapidly putting on weight. That isn't good right? I've never considered myself fat but I have been worrying about my size because let's face it, I eat junk 24/7 and I don't move off my ass. Anyway, I've ordered myself a mini exercise bike to work on my legs and to get some exercise done, even if it's ten minutes a day it's better than nothing. 

Secondly, my internet was meant to be turned on today, well yesterday (the 12th) and apparently there's been a fault. So today will be the first time in a long time that I've not uploaded a daily video to my gaming channel. Ugh. I like to be organised, I feel I'm slightly OCD because everything on my channel has to be scheduled, if it isn't i worry. 

Third issue, I can't stop thinking about all the bad stuff that's happened to me in the past. My teenage pregnancy, falling out with my parents, splitting up with Kyle, even silly things like when I've fallen over. It's all constantly plaguing my mind. Idek if that's how you spell it.  I think you catch my drift right? The fact I'm up in 5 hours to take Dante to school is also worrying me, I have things to do tomorrow like buying bleach, paying the water bill, paying my council tax, picking up Dante's Christmas gift. I know for a fact I'll just be exhausted tomorrow and the thought of climbing back into bed with Kyle at 9am is so tempting. Can't happen though, so instead I'll just be miserable all day. It's all just getting to me. Not only that but today I sprained my ankle so I'm partially crippled and constantly in pain. There's no way of me resting my ankle either. I'm a busy girl. 

My problems probably sound pathetic but to me they're pretty big. Ugh. I've written too much already, but I'm feeling slightly better. If you've read this far, I commend you lmao. There's so much more I could write, but quite frankly my thumb hurts now and I bet you're bored of my mad ramblings. Gbye. 


Post a Comment